Thursday, July 30, 2009

DVD Review - Diagnosis: Death (2009)

Diagnosis: Death, 2009.

Directed by Jason Stutter.
Starring Raybon Kan, Jessica Grace Smith, Suze Tye and Rhys Darby.


SYNOPSIS:

Locked in a medical facility over a weekend as guinea pigs for a drug trial, two cancer patients discover that the clinic may pose more harm than good.


Diagnosis: Death is a low-budget horror comedy from New Zealand and features the trio of stars from Flight of the Conchords – Bret McKenzie, Jermaine Clement, and Rhys Darby – albeit in supporting roles. The film's tone is similar to that of Lord of the Rings director Peter Jackson’s early efforts such as Bad Taste (1987) and Braindead (1992), and features visual effects from Jackson regular and Academy Award winner Christian Rivers, who is set to make his directorial debut in the upcoming remake of The Dambusters.

Having previously worked with director Jason Stutter in the 2002 comedy Tongan Ninja, Raybon Kan stars as English teacher Andre Chang (in addition to writing and producing), who is given the unfortunate news that he is suffering from a rare and incurable cancer. With a maximum of twelve weeks left to live (or possibly six, but any longer than twelve and his doctor will offer a refund), Andre’s only hope is to attend a drugs trial for a radical new treatment, where he meets fellow patient Juliet (newcomer Jessica Grace Smith), a teenage girl also looking to find a miracle cure for her illness.

The couple are introduced to the cold and authoritarian Nurse Bates (Suze Tye), who informs them that the drug may induce possible side effects including paranoia and hallucinations. With the trial underway, Andre and Juliet begin to witness strange happenings around the clinic before learning from Dr. Cruise (McKenzie) that the centre used to be a mental institute. Not only that, but the very mental institute where Juliet’s favourite author happened to murder her child before committing suicide. At first they believe the visions to be caused by the drugs, but as the weird events continue they come to suspect that the hospital may actually be hiding a dark secret and set about to unravel the mystery.

Although Diagnosis: Death is billed as a spoof there is a genuine mystery to explore, and the film also examines the developing relationship between Andre and Juliet in the face of their own mortality. As both writer and star, Kan is comfortable delivering the material and his humour is very natural and subtle, while Bret McKenzie also provides a number of laughs in his role as Dr. Cruise, particularly during the scene where he administers a suppository to Andre. Although this Flight of the Conchords association is bound to be the main selling point of the movie, fans of the show may be a little disappointed by their lack of screen time, with Clement’s role in particular very limited. However it should hopefully allow the film to reach a wider audience, which it certainly deserves.

Diagnosis Death is released on DVD on 3rd August 2009. View the trailer here.

Gary Collinson

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Extreme Cinema - The Idiots (1998)

The Idiots, 1998.

Directed by Lars von Trier.
Starring Bodil Jørgensen, Jens Albinus, Anne Louise Hassing and Nikolaj Lie Kass.


SYNOPSIS:

Unhappy with their lives, a group of misfits find solace in feigning disability.


Lars von Trier’s The Idiots (Idioterne, 1998) features the potentially offensive story of a group of middle class people who pretend to be handicapped as they are unhappy with society. The film begins with Karen (Bodil Jørgensen) a middle aged woman eating in a restaurant. Karen notices two men who appear to be disabled interrupting other customers. Their female companion Suzanne (Anne Louise Hassing) is trying to take care of them. When Stoffer (Jens Albinus), one of the disabled men takes Karen by the hand, she accompanies him and his two friends to their car and joins them for a car ride. Karen then realizes that these are a group of pranksters who did it deliberately to avoid paying for their meal.

The rest of Stoffer’s group is then introduced via straight to camera confessions which continue throughout the film. Karen is the last to join this group of misfits and looks uncomfortable when they visit an insulation factory and pull the same disabled prank. She tells the group leader Stoffer that she does not find the group’s activities amusing. Karen frequently suffers breakdowns and it becomes obvious that she is hiding an unhappy personal life. The group discusses Karen to camera and come to the conclusion that she needs them to find happiness as she is a lost soul. On a later expedition to the woods, Karen asks Stoffer why the group behaves this way as there are people who are genuinely disabled. Stoffer tells Karen that the group is looking for their ‘inner idiot’ as they are all unhappy with their conventional lives and are therefore enjoying ‘spassing out’.

As the group’s pranks continue the to camera confessions make it clear that the group have since dissolved and gone back to their original lives. As Karen leaves the group she tells them that she is happy and has enjoyed her experience. Having struck up a good friendship with Suzanne, Karen takes Suzanne with her when she returns to her family. Suzanne then learns that Karen’s son had died prior to her joining the group.

This film would not be very engaging if it wasn’t for Karen who in many ways represents not only the group’s conscience but also the conscience of the audience watching. The group did feel ashamed as they met a group of genuinely disabled people. At the end as Karen began to ‘spass’ out in front of her family, she began to realize that she couldn’t escape the reality of losing her son. She had joined the group hoping to cope with her loss but was still unhappy. This scene was very moving.

The film also featured full frontal nudity (male and female) and a graphic orgy scene with penetration shots. Thankfully this was relatively brief and was followed by a tender love scene between two of the younger members of the group with obvious strong feelings for each other. The film was not as offensive as its subject matter suggested though it was not an easy film to like as it didn’t make any good points about the disabled and their place in society. The film focused instead on a group of people who really should have known better. Despite the film’s controversial subject matter, the BBFC did not consider it as offensive to the disabled and released it uncut with an 18 certificate, seemingly because it was an art film only likely to appeal to a certain kind of audience.

Santosh Sandhu graduated with a Masters degree in film from the University of Bedfordshire and wrote the short film 'The Volunteers'.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

A Weir View: A Peter Weir Profile (Part 2)

Trevor Hogg profiles the career of director Peter Weir in the second of a two-part feature... read the first part of the article here.

“I start out to tell a story,” Peter Weir responded when the acclaimed director was asked about his signature cinematic style. “All the tools at one’s command, including mood, atmosphere, and design, are just there to serve the story, and the idea within each scene. But given one individual making a number of films there is bound to be parts of your unconscious drive that comes into the films.” Weir went on to add, “Hitchcock said he makes cinema, not photography, and I agree with that. The camera is a tool to get the thing; the power behind the image is what counts.”

Originally The Mosquito Coast was to be Peter Weir’s Hollywood directorial debut but a production delay led him to make a fortuitous career choice. Witness released in 1985 established the Australian filmmaker as an A-List director.

Harrison Ford tossed aside his trusty bullwhip and battled corrupt cops rather than renegade androids. Ford’s transformation into a dramatic actor was so convincing he went on to receive his only Oscar nomination. In the movie, the box office star plays Internal Affairs Det. John Book whose perfectly defined world of right and wrong is turned dangerously upside down when a young Amish boy identifies a fellow police officer as the murderer of his undercover protégé.

As his leading man was redefining himself, Weir focused on telling the story. “I think it’s a case of using one’s creative talents to serve the idea rather than imposing a style overall. The challenge was really to deal with the melodrama with as much grace and style as I could, but not drift too far from it. That’s were the producer and I were a good team. Ed Feldman is an old-time showbiz man, and when I started to become too Amish he would remind me that this was a Western we were making, and to get some shotguns in there!"

Academy Award members were so impressed with Witness that the movie was nominated for eight Oscars including Best Picture and Best Director; it went on to win Best Film Editing and Best Original Screenplay.

With production complications resolved Peter Weir reunited with his Witness star to shoot his 1986 film adaptation of Paul Theroux’s book The Mosquito Coast. In the movie inventor Allie Fox (Ford) uproots his wife and children from the comfort of their New England home to start anew in the vast jungle wilderness of Honduras. Fox’s dream of getting away from civilization turns into a very real nightmare for him and his family.

Weir had high hopes for his second Hollywood picture. “There’s a tremendous amount of emotion in the story.” He explained. “Unless it is harnessed into some sort of framework for me, I’ll be stirring the audience up and they’ll wander out feeling uncomfortable because they were moved, but without understanding what to do with their emotion. I think I’ve got the framework in this operatic feeling. In opera, many times you start with everything wonderful, the songs bright and positive, and then the complexities arise and you end with tragedy.”

Sadly, Harrison Ford’s character proved to be so unlikable that film was universally panned by critics and moviegoers from the test screenings onwards.

From this cinematic misfire, the Australian rebounded in 1989 with one of his favourite, and commercially successful films Dead Poets Society. The inspirational drama takes place in 1959 Vermont at a prestigious prep school where a recently appointed English Literature teacher, John Keating (Robin Williams), runs afoul of conservative-minded administrators and parents when he encourages his pupils to “Seize the day!”

After he read Tom Schulman’s script, Weir could not pass on the project for a couple of reasons. “First it was the theme of standing up to authority, because there have been many times during my childhood and also as an adult when I wanted to stand up and speak my mind, but I didn’t, and I’ve regretted most of those times. Secondly, just the idea of those boys running into a cave in the forest and the cave itself.” The visual potential of the scene caused the filmmaker’s imagination to go into overdrive. “I remember saying to my A.D. [assistant director], ‘You better allow a couple of days for the cave sequence to be shot.’ because I wanted that sort of shift into something more mythic and significant.”

John Keating’s rallying cry: “Carpe diem. Seize the day, boys. Make your lives extraordinary.” was voted as the 95th most popular movie line by the American Film Institute. And in a way, Dead Poets Society did “Seize the day.” The film secured for Peter Weir his second Best Director nomination, and the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay; across the Atlantic at the BAFTAS it was presented with the awards for Best Picture and Best Original Score.

Outside of making movies, another great love of the renowned storyteller is music. “I carry tapes all the time.” He revealed. “They somehow inspire me and I can drift off with them and get ideas out of them. I play them on planes, I play them on the way to work, and on a shoot as well to psych myself up like a football player. Because there’s so much chaos on set, you’ve got to keep yourself up there, and if you succeed, you’ll send out electricity, and everyone will pick up on it. I love music. I think it’s a kind of a fountainhead for me of all the creativity, something uncorrupted by politics.”

From the well of creativity sprung an Oscar-nominated script which Weir directed in 1990. A romantic comedy about a marriage of convenience that transforms into one of mutual love, Green Card, was not only inspired by music but also by his desire to work with a French acting legend. “It’s an original screenplay by me for Gerard Depardieu. A number of the character details are actually taken from his life. I admire him, and it seems an awful loss that he is largely unknown to English speaking audiences, apart from real filmgoers. Most people just don’t go to foreign films.”

Fearless (1993), adapted from the book by Rafael Yglesias, focuses on the relationship between two airplane crash survivors who react very differently to the traumatic event. Carla Rodrigo (Rosie Perez) is catatonic over the lost of her son while Max Klein (Jeff Bridges) continuously pushes the boundaries between life and death. Through each other they are able to reconnect with the world.

To ensure a realistic reenactment of the tragedy, Peter Weir went to Sioux City, Iowa to interview six people who survived the actual plane crash. Their first hand information proved to be indispensable to him. “They told me about the feeling of living 45 minutes with the knowledge that the plane might crash and that they could die, then the experience of the crash itself. As a result of those conversations I completely reshaped the crash and the scenes on the plane, dropped all exterior shots, took very much the passengers’ point of view.”

In regards to Jeff Bridges’ performance, the acclaimed director had nothing but praise. “Jeff was just incredible. He went places that were well beyond the realm of conventional acting.” Interestingly, at the Academy Awards that year, the sole Oscar nomination for the movie went to Bridge’s female costar, Rosie Perez.

Next on the filmmaker’s to-do list was a cautionary tale about the power of media to shape and dictate an individual’s existence. The Truman Show, unleashed in 1998, has Jim Carrey playing a man who discovers that his life is being staged by a global television network.

Critics and audiences embraced the media satire which provided Weir with a few creative challenges. To solve one of them he turned to a much loved movie classic. “I think probably the single film that occurred to me was Dr. Strangelove, in terms of tone – humour mixed with major drama. Kubrick pulled it off. He walked the line.”

There was an unconventional issue that needed to be addressed. “In normal films we’re suppose to forget that there’s a camera,” stated the Sydney native. “But in this case I had to be very conscious of where the camera was. I had to imagine where [the show’s producers] placed it – in a duct, in a button, up his nose or whatever. I turned my head inside out sometimes.”

With three Oscar nominations Best Picture, Best Director, and Best Supporting Actor (Ed Harris), Peter Weir went on to the BAFTAS where the British film industry handed him the David Lean Award for Direction.

Half a decade later, Peter Weir reemerged inspired by the nautical adventure novels of author Patrick O’Brian. Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World had the Australian director collaborate with fellow countryman and acting juggernaut Russell Crowe. Constructed from several books in the Napoleonic Audrey-Maturin series, the high seas tale features British Naval Captain Jack Audrey (Crowe) seeking revenge against an enemy French frigate. His friend, Dr. Stephen Maturin (Paul Bettany), the Chief Medical Officer of the H.M.S. Surprise, views the pursuit to be reckless and he nearly proves to be right.

To better prepare himself, Peter Weir did some preproduction research. “I read all the books about making movies at sea, particularly informative the book on the making of John Huston’s Moby Dick, Jaws by Stephen Spielberg, and you come only to one conclusion, which was don’t film at sea.” Peter Weir heeded the advice. “I made a critical decision, despite having this ship, fully rigged, ready to go to sea, that I would only risk her for second unit shots, and some main unit shooting, but we would replicate it and put it in the tank in Baja, in Mexico.”

Despite not generating enough box office success to warrant a sequel, Master and Commander had a dominating presence at the Oscars with ten nominations which included Best Picture and Best Director. Not entirely shutout, the action adventure was awarded for Best Cinematography and Best Sound Editing.

In regards to his attitudes toward producing a blockbuster, Weir stated: “I am not usually sent them. And if I am, I’m just not drawn to them. Sometimes you sweat it out,” This attitude has resulted in large time gaps between his theatrical endeavors, however, Weir remains steadfast to his creative ideals. “I have to be patient to find that particular kind of project. Occasionally, I’ll write one myself if I can summon up the energy.”

Even when a script is finalized the story continues to evolve stated Peter Weir, “There is a lot of overemphasis on the original screenplay. What your really want is the conception, the clarity and the beauty of the initial idea. Then the middle period, the actual shooting, is the struggle to realize the idea, given the enormous problem of logistics. The third period, the cutting, is the last chance to write the movie into decent shape. Few outside the cutting room understand that film editing is part of the writing process. It’s always assumed to be a mechanical function, but it is, in fact, writing using pieces of celluloid.”

January 21, 2010, brings forth the worldwide release of Peter Weir’s thirteenth feature length film, The Way Back, ending a seven year hiatus which did not leave him entirely out of the Hollywood spotlight. The six-time Oscar nominated filmmaker was linked to four different projects that did not materialize. Then in July of 2008 word was announced that Weir was adapting and directing Slavomir Rawicz’s memoir The Long Walk: The True Story of a Trek to Freedom. Premiering at the 2010 Telluride Film Festival and given a limited December theatrical run, the epic World War II survival tale stars Colin Farrell (In Burges), Ed Harris (The Truman Show), and Jim Sturgess (Across the Universe) as three prisoners who escape a Siberian labour camp in 1940, and befriend a young Polish girl portrayed by Saoirse Ronan (Atonement).

When asked what he hopes to achieve with each of his films, Peter Weir answered. “I like to think that people get their money’s worth, that I’ve entertained them, because I belong to that tradition of entertainer and storyteller. There’s this cartoon upon my wall of an old lady at a ticket booth saying ‘I want my sense of wonder back.’ I like that idea. It’s a desire to feel that sense of not knowing, that sense of danger and potential interlocked. It’s very difficult to achieve, but the screen is one of the few places where it is possible.”

Whether The Way Back finally awards the Australian filmmaker with the Oscar for Best Director remains to be seen, however, what is for certain is that the man behind the camera will have been focusing on producing a story that will entertain us all.

Visit the Peter Weir Cave.

For more on the director be sure to check out our special Peter Weir blogathon, which you can access here.

Trevor Hogg is a freelance video editor and writer who currently resides in Canada.

UK Box Office Top Ten - weekend commencing 24/07/09

UK box office top ten and analysis for the weekend of Friday 24th - Sunday 26th July 2009.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince continued its meteoric performance at the UK box office with second weekend takings in excess of £5m to remain firmly in control at the top of the chart. The David Yates directed sequel has took an astonishing £33m in just two weeks, making it clear front runner for highest grossing film of the year, and could manage to break into the all time U.K. top ten (with tenth place currently occupied by Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest on £51,735,498).

Disney rom-com The Proposal (starring Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds) opened in second place with £3.25m, while Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs slips into third but pushes its overall tally past the £25m mark after four weeks on release. There was little other movement in the chart, with The Proposal also pushing Bruno, The Hangover, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, Public Enemies, My Sister’s Keeper, and Moon down once place each from last week, while another new entry – Lars von Trier’s controversial horror Antichrist – propping up the chart in tenth.

The Hangover has now spent the most amount of time in the top ten (seven weeks), while Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs looks set to overtake Transformers’ total gross in the coming days to become the second biggest movie of the year behind Potter.
















































































Pos.FilmWeekend GrossWeekTotal UK Gross
1Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
£5,176,9502









£33,070,181
2The Proposal
£3,249,6401

















£3,249,640
3Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs£2,151,2514



















£25,257,783
4Bruno£1,212,6413

















£13,153,625
5The Hangover£687,7727

















£19,485,350
6Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen£416,5796

















£25,885,419
7Public Enemies£277,3534



















£6,353,498
8My Sister's Keeper£224,3205























£5,602,199
9Moon£137,9632



















£448,838
10Antichrist£99,0921

























£99,092


Incoming...

The studios look to capitalise on the summer holidays with two family releases this weekend, but can Land of the Lost or G-Force manage to dethrone Harry Potter at the top of the chart? The gerbil action comedy G-Force did so across the Atlantic when it opened in top spot this past weekend, and with several family films splitting the audience Tony Scott's remake of The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 (with Denzel Washington and John Travolta) could also make an impact.

Also released is the biography Coco Before Chanel starring Audrey Tautou and illegal immigration drama Crossing Over with Harrison Ford and Ray Liotta.

Monday, July 27, 2009

British Cinema - London to Brighton (2006)

London to Brighton, 2006.

Directed by Paul Andrew Williams.
Starring Lorraine Stanley, Georgia Groome, Johnny Harris and Sam Spruell.


SYNOPSIS:

A gritty and unflinching drama about the lowlifes and criminals that inhabit London’s seedy underworld.


Kelly and eleven year old Joanne burst into a grim public toilet at 3am in the morning. Joanne is frantically sobbing and Kelly’s face is severely swollen and turning black and blue. London mobster Duncan Allen has been stabbed in his bedroom and his son Stuart wants to know who is behind his father’s imminent death. Stuart realises that Duncan had a prostitute with him that evening and calls upon local pimp Derek to find him the answers he needs. Derek knows that Joanne and Kelly are responsible for Duncan’s condition and that he must find them before he pays the price for their actions. Kelly and Joanne must keep running to stay alive and they head to Brighton to take cover, but those who are on their trail aren’t far behind.

London to Brighton starts by throwing the audience right into the action of the narrative, beginning with an intense energy that rarely falters throughout the following 85 minutes. The film actually begins in the middle of the narrative’s timeline, and Joanne and Kelly’s escape to Brighton is often interrupted with several scenes set in the past which reveal exactly why the two of them are on the run.

The film deals with a shocking and controversial subject matter mainly focusing on the depravity and corruption of child prostitution. Kelly is summoned by her pimp Derek to find young girl for Duncan Allen, and Kelly, who relies on Derek to look out for her, doesn’t have much choice but to head to the streets to look for a pre-teen prostitute. She stumbles upon runaway Joanne, who tries her best to act tough and agrees to Derek’s proposition of ‘spending an hour’ with a stranger for the grand sum of £100. This difficult topic is handled in a way that doesn’t shy away from disturbing the viewer (a film about child prostitution that wasn’t unsettling would clearly not be doing its job) but doesn’t cross boundaries into the unacceptable. A scene between Joanne and Duncan isn’t avoided and illustrates just how warped and sadistic he really is, but what I personally found most unnerving was the constant juxtaposition between Joanne’s innocence with the perverse and brutal world she is being dragged into. Scenes in which Joanne enthusiastically tries to win a teddy bear in an arcade, or vigorously bounds towards the sea to splash in the waves, or has various shades of primary colours plastered onto her face before declaring she has never worn make up, all poignantly remind the audience that Joanne’s fragile childhood is under threat from her corruptive pursuers.

Joanne’s innocent character and the sordid circumstances she is being subjected to are not the only two aspects set in contrast. The film is full of such elements, some of which also serve to make the atmosphere more unsettling, such as Duncan Allen dressed completely in white in his eerily pure and pristine home, which is later the scene of such evil and vulgarity. However, I think the changing tone possibly provides one of the most interesting comparisons. London to Brighton is constructed from a hybrid of genres. It clearly has elements of ‘Brit-grit’ realism, a gripping thriller, a British gangster flick and an unconventional revenge story, all of which create an often fast-paced, tense atmosphere that leaves the viewer literally on the edge of their seat (sorry to use a bit of a tired phrase here, but I think it quite accurately describes my behaviour whilst watching the film).

Contrary to this however, there is also a prevailing tone of languid desperation which permeates the narrative at certain points. Whether it’s Kelly’s lethargic friends in Brighton wordlessly lounging around their house and lazily smoking a joint first thing in the morning, Derek’s ‘girlfriend’ passively accepting to have group sex with his friends in his grey, dreary flat, or the various pathetic characters such as Derek and his sidekick Chum radiating a sense of uselessness, there is certainly a sense of lost hope, which suggests that many of these characters are trapped in a despondent life they have little hope of escaping from. The viewer can only hope that Joanne does not suffer the same fate.

London to Brighton is tense, melancholic, unsettling, heart-breaking and yet occasionally satisfying and optimistic, so I was understandably left a tad overwhelmed after my first viewing, especially as it’s quite short; the whole thing feels a bit like you’re caught in a whirlwind that carries you from city to seaside and back in under 90 minutes. However after a few moments of collecting my thoughts I realised that this is ultimately a good thing, as there are very few films that have left such a strong impression on me. I quickly came to the decision that this is one of the most well-crafted examples of recent British cinema, with an utterly absorbing plot and accurate, honest performances. It’s not an easy watch, but it’s certainly a rewarding and compelling one.

Amy Flinders

Sunday, July 26, 2009

1 Day teaser trailer and official website

The trailer for British 'rap opera' 1 Day has been released online, along with the official website which you can check out here. Written and directed by Penny Woolcock, 1 Day examines 24 hours in the violent lives of two street crews, inspired by notorious local Birmingham gangs The Johnson Crew and Burger Bar Boys, and features non-actors performing their own music.

The synopsis from the site:
"Flash wakes up to a phone call from Angel announcing that he's being released from prison and wants the 500k he'd left with Flash for safekeeping. Short of the full amount and pushed for time, Flash is forced to strike a deal with Evil, who more than lives up to his name. 1 Day follows Flash's race against the clock as he's pursued by a rival gang, the police, his three irate babymothers and his granny."
1 Day teaser trailer:


The film is set for release on September 4th, 2009.

Saturday, July 25, 2009

I Sat Through That #4 - Meet The Parents (2000)

In which Gerry Hayes considers Meet The Parents and punches himself in the face again and again and again...

Meet The Parents, 2000.

Directed by Jay Roach.
Starring Ben Stiller, Robert De Niro, Teri Polo.
Screenplay by Greg Glienna.

Gah! Nooo! How can one film have so much bad in it? Please, why do you make me think about it? Why? What have I ever done to you? Please, no more. Oh, sweet mother of stinkers.

These are just some of the things that ran through my head on considering Meet The Parents. As frequently happens with these things, I may be in a minority - from the box-office takings and the sequel(s) it seems there are many people out there who like this film. I can only assume that a lot of day trips were organised from a lot of care-homes for the simple and bemused. I imagine them all, sitting in the dark, a trickle of drool hanging precariously from their chins as they beam vacantly at the screen, generally having a good time in their feeble-minded way. I imagine them and I want to kick each of them in the groin because it’s their fault there are films like this.

Stiller is Greg Focker or more accurately, as we so hilariously find out, Gaylord Focker - Gay Focker, get it? Oh, my sides, my sides! He’s going out with Pam (Polo) and is off to her sister’s wedding where he’ll get to meet her parents for the first time. A nerve-wracking experience to be sure and one rife with comedic potential. Amazing then, that this film fails, utterly, to find any.

De Niro plays Pam’s dad, Jack. What happened, Bobby? Christ. Watching De Niro do comedy is like watching your hero, someone you always looked up to, get drunk at a wedding and start groping strangers before getting in a fight, falling over and pissing themselves while muttering profanities at your mum from his puddle on the floor. I hate watching De Niro do comedy. He’s no good at it. Have we learned nothing from Analyse This? Gurning moronically is only funny if you’re doing it for a baby. Even then, you’re pushing it. Please stop, Bobby. Please stop the horror (for ‘horror’, read ‘comedy’).

Where were we? Right... Greg’s an imbecile and Jack is both a grumpy twat and a retired CIA operative (although touched on elsewhere, the latter is something that feels shoehorned in, mainly, to fit the "hysterical" scene where he subjects Greg to a polygraph test). Greg’s desperate to impress and Jack hates him - nothing wrong with the premise but there’s such a massive dearth of subtlety that all the laughs are dragged from the film and replaced with an empty, wincing embarrassment.

No subtlety. No realism. No humour.

Meet The Parents is an incongruous, doleful bundle of unamusing gags, crammed awkwardly together and tied up with sticky strings of tenuous plot. It makes me sad.

Read more I Sat Through That? right here.

Gerry Hayes is a garret-dwelling writer subsisting on tea, beer and Flame-Grilled Steak flavour McCoy’s crisps. You can read about other stuff he doesn't like on his blog at http://stareintospace.com or you can have easy, bite-sized bits of him at http://twitter.com/gerryhayes

Tron Legacy teaser trailer from Comic Con online...

Disney release 3 minute trailer for upcoming sequel...

Back in 2008, Walt Disney Pictures screened a three minute clip of the long-rumoured follow up to 1982's cult classic Tron at the San Diego Comic Con, and at long last the footage has finally been given an official release online.

Now dubbed Tron Legacy (after going by various working titles such as Tron 2.0 and TR2N), the teaser provides fans with a look at the updated Light Cycles in action, along with a glimpse of the returning Jeff Bridges, who reprises his role as computer programmer Kevin Flynn.

Directed by Joseph Kosinski, Tron Legacy follows the adventures of Flynn's son, Sean (Garrett Hedlund), who travels to the Computer World in search of his father. The film (with a rumoured budget of anything up to $300 million) is set for a 3D release late next year.

Trailer courtesy of TrailerAddict:



Movies... For Free! Return of the Street Fighter (1974)

Welcome to this week's "Movies... For Free!" column, where we showcase classic movies freely available in the public domain (with streaming video!). Read the article and watch the movie right here!


Return of the Street Fighter, 1974.

Directed by Shigehiro Ozawa.
Starring Sonny Chiba, Yōko Ichiji, and Masashi Ishibashi.

After Bruce Lee's classic Enter the Dragon (1973) had popularised the martial arts genre in the West, Japanese production house Toei Company quickly capitalised with their own release, The Street Fighter (1974), starring Sonny Chiba (also available in our Movies... For Free! collection). With The Street Fighter achieving wide international success, Toei immediately began work on a follow up and Return of the Street Fighter was rushed to cinemas later that year.

Chiba returns as martial arts master and mercenary Takuma 'Terry' Tsurugi, who once again upsets his yakuza employers when he refuses a contract to kill personal friend Masaoko (Masafumi Suzuki). Naturally the gangsters aren’t too happy with Tsurugi's insubordination and set about to make him pay, while old enemy Junjo (Ishibashi) also has his sights on revenge, laying the foundations for a bloody ballet of cartoon hyper-violence.

Return of the Street Fighter managed to repeat the success of its predecessor and inspired another sequel - The Street Fighter's Last Revenge - to complete the trilogy.

Please note that the film is split into two parts - the second part will load automatically after the first has finished, simply click play to resume.



Embeds courtesy of Internet Archive.

Click here to view all previous entries in our Movies... For Free! collection.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Five Essential... Jim Carrey Films

Richard J. Moir selects his Five Essential Jim Carrey Films...

5. The Mask (1994, dir. Chuck Russell)

The Mask is a perfect example of Jim Carrey's slapstick comedy. The way his body moves and bends in this '94 classic showed what he was capable of. While transformed as the Mask, Carrey had lots of room to do his thing, and while just as regular everyday Stanley Ipkiss, showed true acting potential.








4. Dumb and Dumber (1994, dir. Peter and Bobby Farrelly)

One of the classic comedys from the nineties, with Carrey in his early days showing us a glimpse of his potential to be a hit comedy actor. This film is full of sight gags, witty lines and great performances from Carrey and Daniels.









3. Man on the Moon (1999, dir. Milos Forman)

A lot of people see Jim Carrey as an over the top actor, bizarre and crazy. But despite what these people say about him, he does it brilliantly. Man on the Moon doesn't just highlight his typical but brilliant acting style, it shows that he can change at the flick of a switch, from an eccentric avant-garde "comedian", to a bad-ass wrestler and then to a man who we can't help but feel the deepest sympathy for. Kaufman was never understood and it shows why throughout this film, with such crazy antics as the opening credit sequence, wrestling women and purposely creating characters to loathe. Danny DeVito is great in his role, as is Giamatti but it's Carrey that steals the show.



2. The Truman Show (1998, dir. Peter Weir)

A very clever, original and thought provoking film which sees Jim Carrey play Truman Burbank, a man who doesn't know he's the star of a reality TV show. While the film is clever, advertising products, making real-life with actors etc, Jim Carrey shines as the "star", who soon works everything out. Jim Carrey shows he can do serious acting, but it doesn't quite top the number one spot.







1. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004, dir. Michel Gondry)

One of those movies that you really have to stay with or you'll be lost throughout the rest of the film. Jim Carrey takes on a serious role in this gem, while Kate Winslet almost takes his place as a zany, "out there" woman, trying to win his heart. A brilliant cast brought together by a brilliant script and director Michel Gondry. The film is very original, and that may be an understatement, as it sees Joel (Carrey) re-living moments he shared with Clementine (Winslet) while also erasing them from his memory. The story is brilliant, the cast chemistry superb, which makes a great original film. While Jim Carrey is seen as a over-the-top comedic actor, ESofSM shows he has great talent in any genre. A wonderful performance and his best film to date.


Honourable Mentions...

Liar Liar (1997, dir. Tom Shadyac)
Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994, dir. Tom Shadyac)
Me Myself and Irene (2000, dir. Peter and Bobby Farrelly)

Jim Carrey Workout Video...


Agree? Disagree? We'd love to hear your comments on the list...

Richard J. Moir

Essentials Archive

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Extreme Cinema - Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer (1986)

Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer, 1986.

Directed by John McNaughton.
Starring Michael Rooker, Tom Towles and Tracy Arnold.


SYNOPSIS:

A serial killer instructs a protégé in murder and escaping justice.


Filmed in a documentary style, Henry : Portrait of Serial Killer (1986) would cause serious problems for the British Board of Film Classification due to its cold attitude towards violence and sexual violence. Originally made in 1986 but submitted to the BBFC in 1990, Henry was loosely based on the exploits of real life mass murderer Henry Lee Lucas.

The film begins with a montage of Henry’s victims with their screams heard on the soundtrack. Henry (Michael Rooker) has been released from jail and has taken up a regular working class job. He soon meets up with his old friend Otis (Tom Towles) and Otis’s sister Becky (Tracy Arnold). Henry begins to bond with Becky as he appears to respect her whilst Otis frequently belittles her and even attempts to molest her. Otis is then introduced to serial killing by Henry when they pick up a couple of prostitutes who have their necks broken by Henry. Henry then dumps their bodies into a rubbish bin. Later the pair kill a television salesman and steal from him a television and video camera.

The film’s most shocking sequence is when Henry and Otis videotape themselves butchering an entire family. Arriving home late one night, Henry finds Otis attempting to rape Becky but Henry intervenes and kills Otis after Becky has stabbed Otis in the eye with a comb. Henry takes Otis’s body into the bathroom and dismembers it and puts it into plastic bags. Henry and Becky then go on the road together. Henry dumps Otis’s body parts into a river and he and Becky then stay the night in a motel. In the morning Henry is driving alone, he stops the car and takes out a large suitcase and dumps it onto the side of the road and drives off. It is obvious he has disposed of Becky in a similar fashion to Otis.

The videotaped massacre of the family caused serious consternation for censor James Ferman. The scene begins with a woman struggling with Otis whilst Henry films them. By Henry’s feet, a man is seen bound and gagged. A boy enters the room and sees what is going on and attempts to run, Henry puts the camera down and grabs the boy, throws him to the floor and snaps his neck. Otis then snaps the neck of the woman he is holding and molests her dead body. All of this is captured by the camera. In the next shot it becomes obvious that Henry and Otis are actually watching this event on their TV. This scene was cut by just over a minute for the film’s cinema release.

Unhappy with its potentially titillating sexual violence, Ferman had this scene cut by a further 52 seconds for its video release after discussing its potentially adverse effects with psychiatrists. This scene was also reedited so the shot of Henry and Otis watching the TV appeared earlier in the sequence so the neck breaks occurred off camera. This inadvertently lessened the impact of the scene considerably as it was meant to surprise the audience when they realized they were watching a video recording. Ferman then released this version onto video in 1991 with an 18 certificate. Under the new BBFC guidelines of 2000, the film was eventually re-released in its original uncut form onto video/DVD in 2003. This version also included a scene from the opening montage which was originally cut by the film’s distributors. It featured the body of a half naked woman slumped on a toilet with a broken bottle in her face.

Henry is still a very shocking film but a deeply moralistic one. The film maintains a sombre tone throughout with a very eerie soundtrack. The documentary style is very skillfully deployed. The acting by the principles is very natural and they are all very ordinary looking which is what serial killers actually look like. Ferman’s reasons for cutting the film were confusing as the film never glorified any of its violent scenes and simply appeared to be censored for being too bleak and realistic. It was a shame that this film was overlooked in favour of the overblown theatrics of The Silence of the Lambs (1991).

The character of Henry is featured in Only Good Movies Blog's Top 100 Movie Killers.

Santosh Sandhu graduated with a Masters degree in film from the University of Bedfordshire and wrote the short film 'The Volunteers'.

Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland trailer...

Teaser trailer released for upcoming Lewis Carroll adaptation...

IGN have got their hands on the first official teaser trailer for Tim Burton's latest, Alice in Wonderland, based on the popular (and bizarre) children's novel by Lewis Carroll.

The live-action movie is produced by Walt Disney Pictures and stars Mia Wasikowska as the titular Alice, along with Burton regulars Johnny Depp (as The Mad Hatter), Helena Bonham Carter (The Red Queen) and Christopher Lee (The Jabberwock). Also featuring in the ensemble are Michael Sheen (The White Rabbit), Anne Hathaway (The White Queen), Alan Rickman (The Caterpillar) Stephen Fry (The Cheshire Cat) and Matt Lucas (Tweedledum and Tweedledee).

Check out the YouTube embed below:


Alice in Wonderland is scheduled for a 3D release in March 2010.

A Weir View: A Peter Weir Profile (Part 1)

Trevor Hogg profiles the career of director Peter Weir in the first of a two-part feature...

From a land, the ancestral dream of its Aboriginal people, comes an Australian filmmaker known for producing cinematic tales with an ethereal quality – Peter Weir.

The transformation of the Sydney native into a Hollywood director occurred on a cruise ship headed to England. To entertain themselves and the other passengers, Weir and his friends wrote and performed various satirical skits. The experience proved to be so enjoyable and successful that the young traveler found himself a vocation and a wife all at the same time.

Four years later the married couple returned to London with the intention of settling there, but they quickly abandoned the idea. “I couldn’t get back to Australia quick enough,” reflected Weir, “to a more barren cultural environment. I had become part of the process of making something: I will make something in this barrenness. Scripts and films would be my way of reinventing the escape that the ship was in ’65.”

After working briefly at Sydney television station ATN 7, Weir joined the Commonwealth Film Unit (now Film Australia) in 1967 as an assistant cameraman and production assistant. He would soon graduate into writing and directing a series of short films as well as a T.V. episode of Three To Go. Entitled Michael, the 1970 small screen tale depicts the title character being befriended by a student radical, while riots unfold in the city; unfortunately, the personal encounter leaves him feeling even more disenfranchised from the world.

As in Hollywood, the Australian film industry experienced a new wave of independent minded talent determined to reshape the theatrical landscape during the 1970s. In the middle of this homegrown Cultural Revolution, which included the likes of George Miller, Phillip Noyce, Gillian Armstrong and Bruce Beresford, was Peter Weir.

1971 saw the release of the macabre short film, Homesdale, which was Peter Weir’s first independently funded directorial effort. The movie was named after a guesthouse located on a secluded island run by a sadistic manager. He entertains his convalescing guests by having them participate in a series of bizarre activities, some of which have deadly consequences.

After Homesdale the budding artist received a film school grant for an apprenticeship at the legendary English film studios at Pinewood and Elstree where he worked in the special effects department. While touring France an unexpected traffic detour provided him with the inspiration for his first feature length film. “Weeks later in England,” He began. “I saw a front page story in the paper about a shooting, some crime of passion, while down in a very small column was that in Britain that weekend 23 people had lost their lives on the road. I put it together with the French thing and thought, if you were going to kill someone, you’d do it with a motor car accident – it’s accepted as an act of God. I wrote a short story that became The Cars That Ate Paris.

The 1974 movie takes place in a mysterious Outback town of Paris where residents redirect passing traffic with the intention of creating automobile accidents. The wrecked vehicles are then sold for their parts and the mentally incapacitated outsiders are subjected to medical experiments; further mayhem ensues when the close-knit community decides to adopt an unscathed survivor.

An adaptation of Joan Lindsay’s novel Picnic at Hanging Rock became the director’s next project in 1975. In filming the strange period tale about a group of schoolgirls who vanish upon entering a mysterious rock formation, Peter Weir had to address a fundamental narrative problem. “With much of Picnic at Hanging Rock it was clearly dangerous ground I was treading on, given the audience’s preconditioning, with a mystery that had no solution. I had to supply an ambience so powerful that it would turn the audience’s attention from following the steps of the police investigation into another kind of film.” So Weir created an otherworldly atmosphere by experimenting with camera speeds as well as various types of recorded sounds such as white noise and earthquakes.

The roving Australian encountered his creative muse again while on holiday in Tunisia. “I found a buried Roman head, a beautiful piece of marble which I somehow knew I was going to find. It was an extraordinary experience.” Peter Weir remarked upon recalling his moment of premonition. “I wondered what if a lawyer had found it, someone whom it was harder to assimilate, the rational man rather than the filmmaker who deals with the imagination.” The idea percolated to the point that it became the starting point for Weir’s follow-up movie The Last Wave. In this 1977 film, an Australian lawyer (Richard Chamberlain) defends a group of aborigines who are charged with killing one of their own for violating a tribal taboo. As the murder case progresses he becomes plagued by apocalyptic visions of water that entwine him with the prophetical beliefs of his clients.

Having not completely abandoned television, Weir returned to the medium in 1978 with The Plumber. The T.V thriller deals with an annoying handyman who psychologically torments his employer. Weir acknowledged that the motivation for creating the small screen tale came out of necessity. “It was written because I needed the money, which is sometimes the good way of doing things.” He also revealed that the story was based on a true life event. “The couple were friends of mine and the plumber was based on someone I had given a lift to once, hitchhiking, and except for the singing in the bathroom and the ending it was pretty much as it happened. In reality, the plumber did leave, but my friend told me, ‘The strange thing was that it brought out in me a kind of deviousness, a desire for the survival of my mental state that led me to consider doing really drastic things.’”

Aroused by his European adventures Peter Weir decided to direct a film about an epic event in his country’s history. “I went to Istanbul, hired a car and drove to the battlefield, an extraordinary experience.” recalled the Australian director of his 1976 trip to Turkey. “I saw no one in two days of climbing up and down slopes and wandering through the trenches, finding all sorts of scraps left by the armies: buttons and bits of old leather, belts, bones of donkeys, even an unbroken Enos fruit salts bottle. I felt somehow I was really touching history, that’s really what it was, and it totally altered my perception of Gallipoli. I decided right then and there that I’d make the film.”

Gallipoli (1981) evolves around the growing relationship between two runners, portrayed by Mel Gibson and Mark Lee, whose destiny with death takes them to the infamous Turkish battlefield; there thousands of Australian soldiers were senselessly slaughtered during WWI. Picnic at Hanging Rock may well have provided Weir with international exposure but Gallipoli cemented his global reputation by winning him eight of twelve Australian Film Institute nominations including Best Picture, Best Director, and Best Actor (Gibson) at the nation’s equivalent of the Academy Awards.

Working on another book adaptation, this time by author Christopher Koch, Weir went about assembling what would literally become The Year of Living Dangerously (1982) for the director as well as his cast and crew. Death threats claiming the movie production to be imperialist and anti-Muslim resulted in the filmmaker abandoning the Philippines and completing the remaining principal photography back home in Australia.

Part love story and part thriller The Year of Living Dangerously is set in 1965 midst the civil and political unrest of Indonesia. Mel Gibson plays the role of newly arrived Australian correspondent Guy Hamilton who is befriended by the enigmatic freelance cameraman and photographer Billy Kwan (Linda Hunt). Hamilton is bewitched by British embassy officer Jill Bryant (Sigourney Weaver) whose trust he eventually betrays to further his career.

Weir explained why he chose to have Linda Hunt portray a central male character. “I needed to equal the originality of Koch’s creation in the novel. It was an accident or rather sheer desperation that led me to Linda.” Weir remarked. “I was dealing with an almost mythical character – something like a Grimm’s fairy tale character who had been transformed by a witch into a hunchback or a frog. I got very excited when I began to think of the implications of casting Linda. So I built the film around that and embraced that casting. A risky decision but it paid off.”

And did the director’s gutsy casting decision ever payoff. When Linda Hunt received the Best Supporting Actress award she was the first and remains the only actor to win an Oscar for portraying a person of the opposite gender. However, the accolades where not confined to Hunt; both her director Peter Weir and costar Mel Gibson were now on their way to make their mark in Hollywood.

Click here to read the second part of this feature...

Visit the Peter Weir Cave.

For more on the director be sure to check out our special Peter Weir blogathon, which you can access here.

Trevor Hogg is a freelance video editor and writer who currently resides in Canada.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

UK Box Office Top Ten - weekend commencing 17/07/09

UK box-office top ten and analysis for the weekend of Friday 17th - Sunday 19th July 2009.

No surprises at the top of the UK box office this weekend as Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince cast a spell over cinemagoers and destroyed the competition with an astronomical opening just shy of £20m (£11.93m Fri-Sun, with an extra £7.85m from Wednesday and Thursday screenings).

Potter’s
debut haul is more than double that of the previous biggest opener of 2009, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, and the boy wizard is already just £5m away from becoming the highest grossing movie of the year in the U.K. after less than one week on release.

Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs stands firm in second place, having crossed the £20m mark after three weeks, while last week’s number one movie Bruno drops two places to third with overall receipts of £10m. Todd Phillips’ comedy The Hangover continues to demonstrate staying power and is yet to fall below fourth place after six weeks in cinemas. Meanwhile, Michael Bay’s much criticised Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen drops two spots to fifth, while gangster epic Public Enemies and emotional drama My Sister’s Keeper each slip one place apiece from last week.

Neatly coinciding with the fortieth anniversary of the Apollo 11 moon landings, director Duncan Jones’ (a.k.a Zowie Bowie) debut feature Moon opens in eighth position despite a limited release on only 57 screens - less than a third of nearest rival Year One, which sits one place below in ninth – while Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian falls to tenth after nine long weeks in the chart.
















































































Pos.FilmWeekend GrossWeekTotal UK Gross
1Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
£19,784,9241







£19,784,924
2Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs£2,849,9813

















£20,283,183
3Bruno£2,301,4322

















£10,357,495
4The Hangover
£881,5146















£18,142,083
5Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen£678,7435















£24,919,977
6Public Enemies£470,6513















£5,728,410
7My Sister's Keeper£378,6804



















£4,955,541
8Moon
£157,8671





















£157,867
9Year One£53,0334

















£2,776,236
10Night at the Museum 2£49,5709























£19,560,553


Incoming...

With the blockbuster season almost at a close Disney will be hoping (rather optimistically) that the Sandra Bullock – Ryan Reynolds rom-com The Proposal can offer an alternative to Harry Potter when it opens on Wednesday. Meanwhile Lars von Trier’s controversial horror Antichrist hits screens on Friday, along with limited re-releases for classics Once Upon a Time in the West and The Blues Brothers.

Monday, July 20, 2009

The Untimely Demise of M. Night Shyamalan

Jon Dudley discusses the career of filmmaker M. Night Shyamalan...

The Sixth Sense grossed $672,806,292 worldwide… Unbreakable grossed $248,118,121 worldwide… Signs grossed $408,247,917 worldwide… what do these three films have in common? They were all written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan. Lady In The Water grossed $72,785,169 worldwide but was nominated for four Razzie ‘awards’, winning two of them; Worst Director and Worst Supporting Actor… The Happening grossed $163,403,799 worldwide, which is a very respectable taking, however it was also nominated for four Razzies, including Worst Picture and Worst Director.

So what do the last two films have in common with the first three? They too were both written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan… but what caused his sudden fall from grace from being one of Hollywood’s elite storytellers to having his films being recognised as some of the worst movies of the year?

First let’s look at the narratives: there is no doubt about it that Shyamalan is a master at leading the audience down one path then suddenly showing them they have been following a different one the whole time. This skill is regularly attempted but more often than not it backfires and the audience can guess the conclusion of a film halfway through. The twist at the end of The Sixth Sense was pulled off so amazingly well that after watching it audiences just had to tell their friends – one of the films biggest marketing tools, other than having Bruce Willis as the lead, was word of mouth. But it left Shyamalan with a lot to live up to.

Unbreakable had an incredibly inventive storyline (and also starred Bruce Willis, alongside Samuel L. Jackson), however its marketing strategy prevented it from being a bigger hit - although it was very successful. The fact that Shyamalan’s projects attracted big Hollywood actors goes to show that his ideas were interesting and captivating for audiences. Mel Gibson was the lead in his third hit Signs – which was a lot more successful than Unbreakable, showing that Shyamalan was getting close to achieving what he did with The Sixth Sense. Signs was followed by The Village, and then Night took a gamble which backfired horrendously… he decided to make a film based on a bedtime story he invented for his children.

Let me just make it clear here that there is nothing wrong with deciding to make a children’s tale into a film – look at the successes of The Chronicles of Narnia franchise and Harry Potter films for example. But a sign that should have perhaps made him think twice about making Lady in the Water the way he did was that Disney executives were not going to allow him anywhere near as much freedom on this project as they had done in the past. This led to a highly publicised dispute.

Interestingly, Shyamalan’s epic falling out with Disney was made into a published book written by Michael Bamberger – with Night giving his blessing for the book to be released. Upset with Disney’s lack of faith in him despite his films making them hundreds of millions of dollars, Shyalaman took his idea to Warner Brothers. They emphasised their trust in his project by shelling out a reported $70 million just on the films marketing campaign. But unfortunately for both Night and Warner Brothers, the content left audiences far from satisfied.

And so began his movie-making slump. In a behind-the-scenes documentary of the film, actor Bob Balaban can’t praise the film enough, saying that it was wonderful and unique. Actress Sanita Choudhury says she remembered crying whilst reading the script… whether that was because it was so bad remains to be seen!

I shall at this point make it known that I am, or should I say was, a devoted fan of Shyamalan for many years, and I have written papers in the past doing nothing but praise his delightfully articulate ways of telling beautiful stories. Although I wasn’t the biggest fan of Lady in the Water, I still had a huge amount of enthusiasm for his next film, The Happening. Unfortunately, and it actually hurts to write this, I really thought it was a poor movie… I shall explain…

I waited for months for the release of this film, and as the day of its opening came around I persuaded a friend of mine to go and see it with me. All the way to the cinema I was chatting away about Shyamalan’s previous films – my friend hadn’t seen Lady in the Water so I didn’t bring it up as I wasn’t the films biggest admirer. The friend I was with was Indian like Night, so he thought my childlike enthusiasm about one of his countrymen was quite interesting. And so we took our seats, the lights dimmed and I positioned myself as evenly as possible so that neither of my “cheeks” went numb during the movie, and so limited my fidgeting.

It began… the moment I had been waiting for… M. Night Shyamalan’s return to greatness. About five minutes into the movie the core element of the film was made clear – people are seemingly randomly committing suicide. The whole cinema erupted in laughter, and this is no exaggeration! I was mortified. My friend said nothing to me for the entire film and on occasion I could see him shake as he tried to hide his chuckles from me. I thought the acting in this film, in particular from Mark Wahlberg, was remarkably bad and I was surprised as Night usually generates superbly poignant performances from all the actors he works with. As soon as the film finished I couldn’t wait to get out of the cinema and go home! On the way out of the screen I heard a group of lads in their early twenties mocking the film, and even heard one of them declare that The Happening was “one of the funniest films I’ve seen in years!”

The walk home was a very melancholic one. I felt humiliated in front of my friend, and was so embarrassed that there was one point I nearly offered him the money he paid for his ticket! We lived in the same building so after we had parted ways I immediately ran up to my room and searched the internet for explanations, others peoples opinions and anything else that I could use to convince my friend, and to some extent myself, that what we had just watched wasn’t utter trife.

I did come across one interesting notion – one article I read briefly explained the representation the events were homage to, and how some aspects of the movie cleverly highlighted the current problems in society. This was it, my armoury to prove to my friend that Shyamalan had made a good movie. I emailed him the link to the article and he did read it, but he then said to me in order to appreciate a film he didn’t want to have to read up about it when he got home, which was a very valid point. Unfortunately I thought that I was probably the only person in the screening that wanted to read about it to find its unique selling point.

Shyamalan is currently working on the live action adaptation of the animated TV series The Last Airbender. Maybe the fact that his last two films haven’t been received the way he had thought has led Night to taking on a project that isn’t an original one of his. I will definitely go and watch this film as I would like to see Shyamalan prove he still has what it takes to be a big name in Hollywood, however this time I won’t be as enthusiastic about it like I was when I went to see The Happening, just in case I end up looking like a fool again!

Jon Dudley is a freelance film and television journalist and his 17-minute short film Justification was shown at the 2009 Cannes Film Festival.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

I Sat Through That? #3 - I, Robot (2004)

In which Gerry Hayes dons his Converse All-Stars (vintage 2007), pops some Stevie Wonder on the JVC and copes with his crippling fear of product placement.

I, Robot, 2004.

Directed by Alex Proyas.
Starring Will Smith, Bridget Moynahan and that squidgy bloke from Firefly as a shiny robot.
Written by Jeff Vintar and Akiva Goldsman and, definitely not, Isaac Asimov.

I wonder if there’s any chance of getting free stuff if I do some product placement of my own. I really like my new Porsche 911. It is supremely engineered and an utter joy to drive. Good mileage too. Hello? Porsche? Come on, I couldn’t write about I, Robot and not mention the face-slappingly blatant product placement. It’s incredibly intrusive and I feel it mars what is an, otherwise, magnificent film. Nah, just kidding - it’s rubbish.

Smith plays Detective Del Spooner, a cop with a dark, dark secret that haunts his nightmares and gives him a distrust of anything more technical than a CD player. Pity him then, for he lives in 2035 and the place is overrun with robots. Robot delivery-guys, robot-chefs, robot bartenders, robot hookers.

“Wait,” I hear you call, “what if the robots go mental and start killing people?” Splendid question, but one that’s taken care of by ‘The Three Laws’.
  • A robot cannot harm a human or do bad stuff.
  • A robot must obey a human unless it’s really kinky.
  • I think it was something about pizza.
So, the evil corporate giant is US Robotics. They seem to have a monopoly on the robot-market which isn’t bad in forty-odd years - if my past experience is anything to go by they’d still have been making dodgy modems. One of their top scientists falls to his death in an apparent suicide. Spooner thinks differently though, because there was a robot in the room with the scientist when he died and Spooner really hates robots. Spooner begs his lieutenant for the chance to interrogate the robo-perp - “Just gimme five minutes,” he says. Really. He doesn’t get a chance to break the perp though as the robot is recalled back to Evil Corporate Giant HQ for a reformat.

Undaunted, Spooner continues to investigate the scientists death. He gets set upon by a demolition-bot (where he has his save-the-cat moment even though the ungrateful moggy scarpers when Spooner falls down the stairs) and is attacked in a tunnel by a squadron of robots. What a mess. Why, it’s enough to get him taken off the case.

But, damn, he’s tenacious. Enlisting the help of beautiful, but cold, cliché, I mean, robot psychologist, Susan Calvin, they discover that their robo-perp, who likes to be called ‘Sonny’, is actually a new super-robot with dreams of being some sort of robot cult-leader. He was built by the dead scientist to have secrets that would act as clues for Spooner. Personally, if the guy was able to build clues into a super-robot, I reckon he would probably have been able to pop a letter to Spooner in the post but, there you go.

It’s all been a big plot, you see. The robots are going to enslave the human race for some reason - I wasn’t really paying attention by this stage. Spooner, Sonny, and their beautiful, but cold, lady friend need to save humanity by destroying a giant computer brain in a Death Star-like room just crammed full of health and safety violations.

So humanity’s saved and they’ve all grown in some way. Beautiful, but cold, Calvin is a little less cold and a little hot for Spooner. Spooner is a little less wary of robots and Sonny becomes Robot-Jesus. The end.

Before finishing though, I’d like to list the things I liked in this film:
  • I like all of the abandoned robots in the shipping containers because they make me think of Bender's My Broken Friend song.
  • Stevie Wonder’s Superstition
  • Nothing else.
Oh, and if you owned of those robots, wouldn’t you draw a moustache on it?

Read more I Sat Through That? right here.

Gerry Hayes is a garret-dwelling writer subsisting on tea, beer and Flame-Grilled Steak flavour McCoy’s crisps. You can read about other stuff he doesn't like on his blog at http://stareintospace.com or you can have easy, bite-sized bits of him at http://twitter.com/gerryhayes